When I was a kid, people would always say that time flies by, and I would roll my eyes and think, whatever. They don’t understand. They can drive a car, eat/wear/sleep what and when they want. I had no idea then just how right they were.
Yesterday I had a baby, and now he’s 10. And 5. And my baby baby is 2. I think the funny thing is that I feel the same. I am not old enough, yet, that my life has had to change dramatically from what it was 10 or even 20 years ago. I can still run, hop, skip, bike, eat what I want, and feel good at the end of the day. Yet, the twinge of arthritis in my thumbs reminds me I can’t spin and knit quite as long as I once could at a time.
My time is becoming more precious. If there are 24 hours in a day, and 8 of them are for sleeping, that leaves me 16. Take an hour or so for eating, 3 hours for work, a good 5 hours for kids and that leaves me 7. Add in getting dressed, chaffering, grocery shopping, and all the other things it takes to be a mom of three and keep a house running, and you see I have very little time for me. There are so many things I enjoy doing – reading, knitting, spinning, dyeing, carding, photography, that there is just never enough time to do it all. Sometimes I will sit to knit and as I’m knitting I’ll think, “No, I really ought to be spinning – better use of my time.” So I sit down at my wheel, and then think, no I really DO want to be knitting. I need more hours in the day to get everything done.
My New Years goal was to live a more conscious life. Enjoy the moment I’m living in, do the things I love, take the time to laugh with the kids. I have such a tendency to be doing something, but be on a different planet at the same time. One of the kidlets will tell me a story and I’ll listen with half an ear, adding appropriately excited sounds when necessary, but really? I’m not listening.
It’s not fair to them. And honestly, I’m missing out on so much. I should be listening to them and enjoy it. They tell some awesome stories.